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Chapter 29: We Are All Potatoes
B
oo alighted on his favorite spot in the world….
The top of Aru’s head.
He pecked her affectionately, then hopped about. Even though Aru couldn’t see him, she assumed he was making sure Brynne and Mini were fine, too.
Their pigeon guardian made a strange hissing sound at Garuda, who looked more bewildered than terrified out of his wits, but perhaps that’s to be expected when a pigeon starts insulting you out of nowhere.
“Subala,” said Garuda in his gravelly voice. “You are much changed.”
“He’s been taking new feather supplements,” said Mini defensively.
Boo puffed out his chest. “I am here to tell you that the Pandavas’ mission was sanctioned by me, a member of the Council of Guardians, and therefore you cannot punish them.”
Garuda’s wings lowered, and he looked down at the pane of moonlight in his talons. Aru’s hands twitched to take it. Once they had it, they could finally find the Tree of Wishes.
“You allowed them to go on this quest?” asked Garuda quietly.
Aru frowned. Why did it sound like he was insulting Boo?
Garuda did not take his eyes off Boo. “You should know better. You know the cost. Or perhaps you were blinded by the hope of gaining a new form for your soul. You should have protected your charges.”
The pigeon seemed to wilt.
“Boo does protect us!” said Mini angrily. “He always has!”
“I care very deeply for my girls,” said Boo, a barely restrained fury in his voice.
Garuda regarded him steadily. “And yet even the ones who love us and have our best interests at heart make mistakes. My mother enslaved herself to my aunt by impulsively accepting a bet. Maybe it was her pride. Or maybe she hoped it would put an end to my aunt’s bullying of me. Instead, my mother and I both suffered more. I do not trust any instant fix, be it a bet…or a wish.”
After a moment of consideration, Garuda laid the pane of moonlight on the ground. “As this journey has been sanctioned by a member of the Council, I cannot stand in your way. Though I wish you would let me.”
He pointed to the moonlit square. “Only chakora birds can decipher what is written here. It will reveal where Kalpavriksha has been hidden. But know this: the birds are gossipy things, and they honor no currency except secrets.”
“How do we find them?” asked Aru.
“Follow the path through the moonlight,” said Garuda. He lifted his chin. “I pray you know what you are doing.”
And with that, he unfurled his giant wings and took off.
Aru stared after Garuda as his silhouette shrank into the clouds. She thought she would feel victorious, but instead she felt hollow. Maybe the others felt the same way too, because only Brynne bent to retrieve the moonlit pane.
“Well,” said Boo, almost awkwardly.
He hopped down into Mini’s outstretched palms, tilting his head from one side to the next as he gazed at the unreadable message, and then at Aru, Brynne, Mini, Aiden, and Rudy.
“I must return to the heavens soon,” he said. “I’ve been watching the twins, and—”
“Wait a sec, Boo,” said Aiden. “How’d you know where we were?”
“And that we needed help?” added Brynne.
Boo’s feathers stiffened for a moment, as if he’d been caught off guard. “The Maruts,” he said breezily. “They’re keeping me updated.”
Aru frowned. He’d answered too quickly. Also, the Maruts didn’t know about their mission, did they? As a kinda-sorta-reformed liar, Aru was pretty good at recognizing when someone wasn’t telling the truth.
“Now, please tell me you’ve each brought a change of clothes and you’re not questing in your pajamas,” he said, before leveling a glare at Aru. “Again.”
“Again?” echoed Rudy and Aiden.
“HA,” said Aru a touch too loudly. “Let’s move.”
She had only just noticed everyone’s sleepwear choices. Aiden wore flannel pants and his dad’s old law-school sweatshirt. Rudy was wearing a shimmering snakeskin, patterned with music notes. Brynne looked a bit like an angry armadillo in her silver reflective-armor set. Mini was practically drowning in a long black T-shirt.
And Aru? Well, her old Spider-Man pajamas got incinerated after their first quest.
So she’d switched it up to Iron Man.
“We’ve got stuff to change into,” said Brynne.
“So do I,” said Rudy shyly. “If…you know. If I can go, too.” His cheeks turned red.
The others paused, looking at each other.
Aiden was the first to relent. “I guess we could use a playlist guy.”
Rudy beamed.
“BUT YOU HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO USE A SWORD!” said Brynne.
“I’m sorry. Who in the world are you?” demanded Boo.
“I’m Prince—”
“My cousin, Rudy,” explained Aiden. “He’s adjacent to me, a Pandava adjacent.”
“Pandava adjacent–adjacent,” said Boo, clearly unimpressed.
“Well, if we can’t call all of us Pandavas, then what do we say?” asked Aru. “We need a secret code name—something that sounds strong and capable.”
“How about the Masseters?” offered Mini. “It’s the strongest muscle group in the body based on its weight!”
They stared at her, and Mini clarified: “Your jaw muscles? Duh. It can put two hundred pounds of force on the molars.”
Aiden rubbed his temples, and Boo seemed to wither a little on the spot.
Aru folded her arms across her chest. “What about the Pandava Avengers?”
“I’m thinking…potatoes,” said Brynne.
“The vengeful potatoes?” asked Rudy.
“No,” said Aiden. “Avengers Potatoes.”
“No!” said Brynne. “Just. Potatoes.”
“That’s the most depressing group name ever,” said Aru. “What if we have to explain ourselves? We can’t just be like ‘Look, it’s us! The Potatoes! AKA the Pandavas!’”
“Potatoes are strong, hearty, starchy, and versatile,” said Brynne. “You can do all kinds of things with them: grate, bake, boil, broil, roast, dice, slice, scallop, steam—”
“Please stop,” said Aru.
“—grill, flambé—”
“That does it! You’re officially the Potatoes!” squawked Boo. “Now I must be going. The twins were en route to the House of the Moon when I left and—”
A radio-crackle sound emanated from a small gadget affixed to Boo’s ankle. A deep voice crackled out over the night air:
“Emergency alert! All guardians return to base! The clairvoyant has been abducted. Return immediately!”