HO am I? Why I'm de "Frisco Kid." An wot do I do? I'm on de "road," see! Say, youze ain't got nothin' agin me, have yer, mister? Cos if yer has, I'll chase meself off, fer I'm pretty good at pacin'. No, you hasn't? Well, den I guess it's all square. Yer see I took yer fer a fly cop, an' I'm onto meself fer a jigger w'en it comes to dem people.

Wot! A quarter? Dat's very kind in yer, mister. Now I'se solid fer me bed an' a bowl of java in de mornin'. Yer wants ter ast me a few questions? Den fire away. I'se yer red hot tamale.

A kid wid curley golden hair an' fair complexshun, an' 'bout de size of me? Well, I guess I seed stacks like'm, but I never took pertic'lar notiss, dough if I spots'm, I'll put yer on. W'en did he stray away, an' wot's his monica? I mean wot's his name? Yer see we all travels by monicas on de road. Charley wuz his handle? Say! did he wear his hair middlin' long like a girl's an' hail from Frisco? Den I guess I knowed'm onst. Say! if I tells yer all I knows about'm, yer won't give me de cross hop, will yer? Didn't he sport a little hoop—Hoop?—O' I see yer a gentleman, an' don't talk like me and de people I travel wid. I mean a ring, a gold un, set wid little red rubies?—I guess dat's wot yer calls'm. An' a locket? Yes, I knows de locket too. It opens an' shuts, an' dere's a little pitcher of a lady on one side an' some hair, yaller hair like his, only diffrent, on de other. Do I know w'ere dey is? Yer jest bet I do—here dey is. I allus wore dem roun' my neck since he—Say! Leave go! Don't squeeze me arm like dat. Yer hurts, yer do, an' wot der yer tink I am? A cheap guy?

Yer wants ter know w'ere he is? Den jes' take it easy, an' don't get leary and grab me like dat again, an' I'll tell yer all I knows.

Yer see it wuz dis way. Las' year 'bout dis time, me'n and my pal, "Leary Joe," come down to Sacramento to work de fair. Well, one hot day—an' it wuz a scorcher—Leary Joe got to sloppin' up on white line, an wuz orioide. Den I takes'm to bed, an' not knowin' wot to do wid meself, took a stroll. I wuz mopin' down de main-drag, I mean de main street, w'en I bumped up gainst de kid wid de yaller hair. He was wid four er five hobos, an' w'en I seed his good togs, an' hoop an' gold ticker, I tumbled to wot de gang wuz up to. So I t'ought I'd snare'm meself, an' I up an' sez, jest like we wuz ol' fren's, "Say, kid, w'ere yer ben all day? Come on; let's go swimmin'." Yer see, I tought I'd like ter get a finger in de pie meself.

I guess he didn't kinder like de tuff looks of de crowd, an' de swimmin' got his eye, so he gives de push de shake and does de swift sneak. An' yer ough'to seen de gang. Dey'd liked ter a chewed me up an' pushed me nose in, only dey dassant, cos dey wer' fraid of me pal, Leary Joe, fer he wuz de swiftest scrapper on de drag.

Well, we went swimmin'. On de way I found dat de kid'd run away from home an' jest hit de road. So I ast 'm if he wanted ter travel wid me an' my pal! Leary Joe, cos if he did, we were willin' an' he said —Yes." Somehow, I cudn't tell why, I kinder took ter dat kid. He wuz so pritty an innisent like, jest as if he wuz a girl. An' if I cussed, he'd kinder blush an' wudn't look at me fer a long while. An' den I tumbled dat he had good people an' wuzn't ust to swearin'. An' jest like yer, he wuz allus callin' me down, cos he didn't understand de words I talked, an' den I'd cut de rag short an' tell'm wot dey ment. But he wuz smart, I tell yer; yer didn't have ter give 'm de drop more'n onst to make 'm tumble.

Well, we moped up above de railroad bridge an' undrest on a san'bar w'ere a lot other road-kids, wot I knowed, wuz in swimmin'. Say! it wuz a sight ter see dat yaller-haired kid's clo's. Right down ter de skin dey wuz as fine as fine cud be. A good 'eal better'n I ever wore.

At first, de road-kids, wuz fer guyin' 'm, but I blufft 'm wid der stiff lip, an' dey let up an' wuz very kind ter 'm. It wuz a picnic ter see dat kid. He wuz so funny an' diffrent from de rest of de push. He wuz so innisent an' trustin' like. Why, he guv me his hoop ter wear fer 'm, cos he wuz leary dat it'd slip off'n his finger in de water. An' w'en he took his locket off'n his neck an' put it in his pocket, curius like, I took it ter see wot it wuz like, an' if it wuz snide. But it wuz eighteen K., an' den I kep' it, so de odder kids cudn't swipe it.

Well, we had lots of joy, an' so did de kid, dough he cudn't swim a stroke. Bime'by we all cum out an' lay on de sand in de sun 'cept 'm, an' he said in, foolin' 'round in de shaller places. Pritty quick I got ter jokin' wid 'm, an' I can see 'm now wid his han's claspt behind his head, an' his pritty face all smiles an' laffin', an' his yaller hair flyin' ev'ry way, like a girl's. He wuz walkin' out backwards from de san'bar.

All of a sudden like, he struck a hole an' went down. We wuz all in de water like a shot, but he never cum up any more. Yer see, he struck de undertow an' wuz sucked down. Well, bime'by we all got out an' sat in der san' kinder solem' like fer a long while. Yer see, it wuz hard ter see a poor innisent kid like dat get drownded, even dough we hadn't knowed 'm very long.

Pritty soon, after a while, de "Punk Kid" goes up an' takes de ticker, I mean watch, sayin' fer an excuse like, "Mine's broke." But he didn't need ter 'polygize, fer up goes de "Miget Kid" an' takes his coat, an' de "Cooley Kid" his shirt, an' so on, till dere wuz nothin' left but his kicks, I mean shoes, w'ich I took, coz mine wuz no good. Den we piles up our ole rags in place of his good 'uns, an' drest.

De "Orator Kid" went an' gave de coroner de tip, an' den run out of de office, so dey cudn't pinch 'm. An' w'en de coroner cum down, all drest up fine, an' took de clo's, he said kinder offhand like, w'en he saw de poor, mis'rable rags: "It's only a tramp kid, anyhow."

Well' t'ree days went by, an' den dey foun' de poor little kid way down de river, an' w'en he wuz at de morgue, I went an' took a look at 'm.

Wot? Yer say, why didn't I 'dentify 'm? Well, yer see it wuz dis way: "Leary Joe" an' me wuz goin' ter pull out nex' day, an' I didn't wanter be held fer de inquest, an' besides, dey might ast me some curius questions 'bout wot became of his good togs and jewelry.

Wot? Yu're not cryin', are yer, mister? Well, yu're de funniest guy I ever seen. O! I tumbles now. Yer wuz de kid's ole man. Den I'm sorry fer yer, an' here's my hand on it.

Wot? Five big cart-wheels! I'm much obliged, mister, an' I guess yu'd better keep de hoop an' locket, cos dey belongs ter yer anyways. Well, I must be sayin' "So long," cos here cums my pal Leary Joe, an' we're goin' out on dat freight over dere. Dere she whistles now, an' I must be movin'. Cum on, Leary Joe, an' take de second, she's nice an' clean, an' we can have a good snooze.