With compassion you can die for other people, like the mother who can die for her child. You have the courage to say it because you are not afraid of losing anything, because you know that understanding and love is the foundation of happiness. But if you have fear of losing your status, your position, you will not have the courage to do it.

Thích Nhất Hạnh

 
 
 
 
 
Tác giả: Kristan Higgins
Thể loại: Tiểu Thuyết
Biên tập: Bach Ly Bang
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Language: English
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Chapter 29
ALLAHAN!” I STAMMERED. “Hey! You surprised me.”
“What the hell was that?” he growled.
I waved my hand dismissively. “That was nothing.” He just doesn’t think you’re good enough for me, that’s all. “Want to come in?”
“Grace,” he bit out. “It didn’t look like nothing. It looked like your sister’s fiancé just kissed you. The guy you were going to marry!”
“So I’ve got a lot of ’splainin’ to do?” I said. He narrowed his eyes. Aw! He was jealous! Funny how pleasing that can be, isn’t it? Unfortunately, Callahan didn’t seem to share my amusement. “Well, don’t just stand there brooding, Mr. O’ Shea. Come in. You can grill me all you want.”
With a muttered curse, he came up the steps and into the house, not even glancing down as Angus launched himself through the air to attack. Instead, he took in the wineglasses on the coffee table. The scowl deepened.
“It’s not what you think,” I said.
“And what do I think?” Callahan asked tightly.
“You think…” I squashed a smile. “You think Andrew’s hitting on me.”
“That seemed obvious.”
“Wrong. Sit down, Cal. Want some wine?”
“No. Thank you.” He sat in the spot recently vacated by Andrew. “So? Why was he here? And does he always kiss you on the mouth?”
I nestled into my chair and took a sip of my wine, considering my honey. Yep. Definitely jealous. Perhaps now wasn’t the time to say I found it incredibly sexy. “Andrew hasn’t kissed me for a long, long time. Why he did tonight, who knows? He said it was force of habit.”
“That’s the stupidest thing I ever heard.”
Angus growled, his teeth firmly sunk into Cal’s work boot.
“You’re jealous, aren’t you?” I couldn’t help asking.
“Yes! I am, actually! You loved that scrawny little idiot, and he came over tonight and kissed you. How am I supposed to feel?”
“Well, for one, you should feel happy, because as you said, Andrew’s a scrawny little idiot. And you’re the opposite.”
Callahan started to say something, then stopped. “Thanks.” The corner of his mouth pulled up.
“You’re welcome,” I smiled.
“Do you still have feelings for him, Grace?” he asked carefully. “Tell me right now if you do.”
“I don’t. As you said, scrawny little idiot.”
Callahan considered me for a moment, then reached down to dislodge Angus’s teeth from his shoes. “Go see your mommy,” he said. Angus obeyed, leaping onto my lap and curling in a tight circle. Callahan sat back and looked at me, his face considerably more at ease than when he first came in. “Does it worry you? Andrew kissing someone who’s not Natalie?”
I thought on that. “No. The first time those two saw each other, they fell in love, just like that. Kablammy, like they were hit by lightning.”
“Or a field hockey stick,” Cal added.
Oh. Oh. My heart swelled. “Anyway,” I said, blushing. “Andrew came over because he was…” I paused. “Concerned.”
“Because you’re dating someone with a record?”
“Correct.” I stroked Angus’s sweet, bony head, earning a little groan in response.
“So the man who left you for your sister has a problem with my morals.”
“Bingo.” I smiled across at my sweetie. “And I told him I thought you were pretty wonderful and quite honorable, and I may have mentioned how great you look without your clothes on.” Callahan smiled. “Plus, I told him one of the things I liked best was the fact that you hadn’t fallen for Natalie or Margaret, so I thought you might be a keeper.”
“Grace,” Cal said seriously, leaning forward, “I can’t imagine falling for Natalie or Margaret. Not after meeting you.”
My throat tightened abruptly. No one…no one…had ever compared me with my sisters and found me superior. “Thanks,” I whispered.
“You’re welcome,” he murmured, gazing into my eyes. “You want me to find Andrew and beat him up?”
“Nah,” I said. “It’d be like shooting fish in a barrel.”
He laughed, then reached down to retie the work boot Angus had mauled. “You planning to tell Natalie that her fiancé’s going around kissing people?”
I thought about that for a second, playing with my puppy’s fur. “No. I honestly don’t think it meant anything. I mean, really, Angus has given me a more passionate kiss than that one.” Not to mention you, bub, I added silently. “I think it was just a reflex.”
“What if it wasn’t?” Cal asked.
My head jerked back. “It was. I’m sure. He loves Natalie! They’re crazy about each other. You saw that.”
Cal hesitated, then gave a nod. “I guess.”
He guessed? Everyone could see that Natalie and Andrew were meant to be. It was obvious. Wasn’t it?
Angus snapped awake from his brief nap and leaped off my lap, trotting into the kitchen to see if God had miraculously refilled his bowl.
Callahan leaned back against the couch, looking like a contender for Sexiest Man Alive. In all the time I’d spend with Andrew, I could honestly say I’d never felt like this…the thrilling rush of Cal’s presence mingling with the comfort that came from the certainty that he…well…he liked me. He chose me. He wanted me. He even put up with Angus.
“So how’s your family taking the news that Princess Grace is dating an ex-con?” he asked, grinning a little.
I decided not to tell him about Dad’s eleven-point argument on why Cal was a bad idea or the fact that Mom had already talked to a private investigator. “They’ll get used to it.”
“I guess they thought your cat-wrangling pediatrician was a better choice, huh?”
Those words were Arctic water on my heart. Oh, yeah. Wyatt Dunn, M.D. “Um…well.” I nibbled on a thumbnail. “Callahan. About that.”
“What?” Cal said, grinning. “Don’t tell me he dropped by for some kissing, too.”
My stomach twisted. “No, no. Um, Cal. As long as we’re talking. I need to tell you something. Something you might not like.” I realized I was chewing my thumb again and put my hands in my lap. Taking a deep breath, I looked into Callahan’s eyes.
The smile slipped off his face, leaving it blank and inscrutable. “Go ahead,” he said silkily.
“Well…this is actually kind of funny,” I said, attempting a chuckle. My heart raced in a manic patter. “Here’s the thing. I…I never actually dated Wyatt Dunn. The doctor. The pediatric surgeon.”
Cal didn’t move. Didn’t even blink.
“Yeah,” I continued, swallowing twice, my mouth dry as Arizona in July. “Um…I…I made him up.”
The only sound was Fritz the Cat, ticking away, and the jingle of Angus’s tags as he snuffled around the kitchen. Tick…tick…tick.
“You made him up.”
“Well, yeah!” A panicky laugh burst out of my tight throat. “Of course! I mean, come on! You suspected, right? A good-looking, single, straight pediatric surgeon? I could never get a guy like that!”
Oh, boy, did that ever come out wrong.
“But you could get a guy like me.” Callahan’s voice was dangerously calm.
Shit. “I…well, I didn’t mean it that way. I meant that there’s no such animal. He’s…you know. Too good to be true.”
“You made him up,” Cal repeated.
“Mmm-hmm,” I squeaked, clenching my toes in discomfort.
“Tell me, Grace, why would you do something like that?” The calm in his voice was downright ominous.
I didn’t answer for a minute. The day I made up Wyatt Dunn seemed a long, long time ago. “Well, see, we were at a wedding.” As quickly as I could, I told him about the comments, the bouquet toss, Nat in the bathroom. The words fell out of my mouth like hailstones. “I guess I didn’t want Natalie thinking I wasn’t over Andrew,” I said. “And to be honest—” Cal lifted a sardonic eyebrow but remained silent “—I was tired of everyone looking at me like I was…well, the dog no one wants at the pound.”
“So you lied.” His voice was very quiet. He sat still as a bronze statue, and my heart raced a little faster, making me feel ill. “To your entire family.”
“Well, you know, it made everyone feel better. And Margaret knew,” I mumbled, looking to the floor. “And my friend Julian. And Kiki, actually.”
“I seem to remember you on at least one date with this man,” Cal said. “And flowers…didn’t he send you flowers?”
My face was so hot it hurt. I glanced at Callahan’s face. “I, um, sent them to myself. And…I pretended to be on a date or two.” I winced, then cleared my throat. “Cal, look. It was dumb, I know that. I just wanted everyone to think I was okay.”
“You lied, Grace,” he said, his voice no longer so quiet. Getting a bit loud, in fact, and one could even say rather angry. “I can’t believe this! You lied to me! You’ve been lying for months! I asked you if you were done with that guy, and you said you weren’t seeing him anymore!”
“And I wasn’t, right?” My nervous laugh came out like a dry heave. “Yes, right. I lied. I did. It was a mistake, probably.”
“Probably?” he barked.
“Okay, it was definitely a mistake! I admit it, it was stupid and immature and I shouldn’t have done it, but my back was against the wall, Cal!”
“I’ve got to hand it to you, Grace.” His voice was flat and calm. “You’re a great liar. I did suspect, you’re right. But you convinced me. Well done.”
Youch. I took a quick breath. “Cal, listen. It was juvenile. I know that. But cut me some slack here.”
“You lied to me, Grace. You lied to just about everyone you know!” He jammed a hand through his hair and turned away from me. My temper started to bubble. It wasn’t that bad. No one was hurt. In fact, it’s fair to say that my lie spared people from worrying over poor tragic Grace who was dumped. I know it had made me feel better.
“Callahan, look,” I said more calmly. “I did a stupid thing, I admit it. And I hate to be the one to tell you this, Callahan, but people are flawed. Sometimes they do dopey things, especially around people they love. Surely you’ve heard of such occasions.”
This earned me another glare, but he remained silent. No slack, no understanding, no sympathy. And so, alas, I continued talking, my voice rising.
“I mean, come on, Cal. You’re not perfect, either. Remember? You yourself did a stupid thing to protect someone you loved. I have to say, it’s a little ironic, getting a morality lecture from you, of all people!”
“And just what does that mean?” he asked, his mouth tight.
“It means you’re the ex-con who covered up a crime for his brother and just got out of clink two months ago!”
Oops. Probably shouldn’t have said that. His face went from tight to completely furious. And calm. It was a horrible combination.
“Grace,” he said quietly, standing up. “I can’t believe I was so wrong about you.”
It was like a punch in the heart. I jolted out of my chair, standing in front of him, my eyes flooding with tears. “Wait a second, Callahan. Please.” I took a deep breath. “I’d think that you of all people would understand. We were both doing the wrong thing for the right reason.”
“You’re not over Andrew,” he stated.
“I most certainly am over Andrew,” I said, my voice shaking. I was. And it killed me that he didn’t believe that.
“You lied so people would think you were, and you kept lying, and you’re still lying, and you don’t even see that there’s something wrong with this picture, do you?” Cal stared at the floor like he couldn’t bear to look at me. When he spoke next, his voice was quieter. “You’re lying to your family, Grace, and you lied to me.” He dragged his eyes up to mine. “I’m leaving now. And just in case it’s not clear, we’re done.”
He didn’t slam the door. Worse, he closed it quietly behind him.
Too Good To Be True Too Good To Be True - Kristan Higgins Too Good To Be True