ily was worried.

How she could be happier, more contented and at peace than she’d ever been in her whole life, and be so damned worried all at the same time, she did not know.

Things with Nate were wonderful… no, splendid… no, magnificent.

Well, most of the time.

He worked quite a bit. Even at his age (he was only 28!), he was the Executive Vice President of two divisions of his father’s company and he took his job for his father very seriously. Deadly seriously. It was almost like he owed his life to that job. Nate left before Lily woke up every morning, and Lily was an early riser, and didn’t come home until after eight o’clock every evening.

Sometimes she’d have dinner ready when he’d come home. Other times he’d call her during the day to tell her he was going to take her out to some fabulous restaurant (so fabulous, Nate was significantly taxing the limits of her wardrobe). Twice they’d been to Victor and Laura’s for dinner.

Every night he’d make love to her (and mornings besides), most nights more than once and each time was better than the last.

She’d gone back to Clevedon the second morning after their first night together. She’d told him she had to give Maxine notice and work that notice out at the store. He hadn’t been happy but she’d put her foot down telling him the truth, that her mother and father would never forgive her if she just quit a job and didn’t work out her notice, it was bad form. Eventually, sensing how important it was to Lily because she repeated it, over and over, in a louder and louder voice, he gave in. It was the only time he didn’t go to work early. Instead he took her to the train and kissed her on the platform, kissed her in a way that made her not want to go.

“I’ve changed my mind, I’m not going,” she whispered against his lips.

He’d smiled against hers and she had to admit, she really liked it when he did that.

“Now,” he murmured also against her lips and she really liked that too, “I don’t mind that you’re going.” He kissed her lightly and finished. “I’ll see you at the weekend.”

Maxine, at first, had not been happy.

“I’m never giving you time off again!” she’d yelled. Maxine was somewhat dramatic so Lily was used to her yelling.

“But Maxine, I just quit,” Lily had replied gently and sensibly.

“Tell me about him. What’s he done to you?” Maxine demanded to know.

Maxine had never known Lily Jacobs to even look at a man, much less date, much less drop everything in her life to move to London for some bloke she’d known three days.

Lily told the story, the full story, leaving nothing out. She would have left out the sex parts but Maxine was insistent that she wanted it all.

When she was finished, Maxine contradicted herself.

“You’re not working out your notice. Get back to this man, get back to him now!”

“But, the store…” Lily resisted.

She loved Maxine and she loved that store and she would miss it. It was hidden down a cobbled alley, had a front window that was just two feet up from the cobbles, the window filled mostly with a window box chock full of dazzling flowers. Both sides of old, tiny front door were flanked with enormous, gleaming, cobalt blue flowerpots that also blazed with colour and trailed luscious greenery. The shop was crammed with fun, funky clothes and jewellery made by local artists. But best of all, it was filled every day with Maxine who was what her grandmother would call, “a character”.

Maxine went on with her drama. “Blast the store, it’ll survive. We’ve been talking for an hour and one customer came in and didn’t buy a thing.” Then she’d leaned in, her violet eyes dancing (Lily fancied that Maxine looked a little like Elizabeth Taylor, violet eyes and dark, dark hair but, it must be noted not unkindly, Maxine was an Elizabeth Taylor in her chubby, older years). “Most girls never find a man like that, Lily. You hold on, you hold on for dear life.”

Maxine, Lily knew, read romance novels too. Lots of them.

So Lily had called Nate’s answering machine, left a message and told him she’d be home two weeks earlier than expected. She went to her ramshackle house and did what she needed to do, packing a couple of bags. Nate had told her they’d be back and frequently so she’d have plenty of time to get more of her things. She felt funny leaving her house but it wasn’t going to grow legs and walk away whereas Nate already had legs and she never wanted to give him a reason to walk away, and after awhile, after she knew Nate better, they’d come to a different arrangement.

But now he wanted her in London. He wanted her with him and he was wonderful, handsome and smart. He was a fantastic kisser and even better with his hands and other parts of his anatomy and he thought she was funny.

And he looked at her like, well, like she was beautiful.

He was everything she’d ever wished she would have, everything she wished for Fazire to give her.

And she was going to hold on to him for dear life.

The first week with Nate had been fantastic; the only thing marring it was dinner at Laura and Victor’s. Jeff and Danielle had been in attendance and even though Victor and Laura seemed pleased that Nate and Lily were together (not exactly pleased so much as over the moon), Nate’s siblings did not.

Danielle said catty things about Lily’s outfit and her accent, things which made Victor’s lips thin and Laura blush with ire but it was Nate who said, “Danielle, enough,” in a way that everyone at the table knew it was enough and Danielle stopped immediately, if rather mutinously.

Then, if that wasn’t bad enough, after dinner, when Lily had been coming back from the powder room, Jeff was waiting for her. He cornered her as in literally cornered her, against the wall in a corner, blocking her path with his body so she couldn’t get out.

“I can’t believe you chose him, Lily. I can’t believe it. Do you know who he is?” Jeff was talking low and fast and looking at her as if she was a juicy steak and he was a rabid dog.

He was also scaring her half to death.

“Jeff –”

“I don’t mind that you’ve slept with him, I don’t care that he had his filthy hands on you. You and I can start again.” She stared at him open-mouthed and speechless. She didn’t know they’d started at all. “But once you know who he is, what he is, where he came from… Lily, you have to know.”

Lily interrupted him, saying, “I chose Nate.”

She wanted to get away from him, needed to get away. He was revolting, vile and now, frightening in his hatred. She didn’t know what he was talking about and she didn’t care. Lily realised she’d been right the first time she met him; there was nothing to like about him at all. He was talking about his brother, for goodness sake.

“Lily, once I tell you –” He went on, moving closer to her and lifting his hand like he was going to touch her.

“I choose Nate!” she snapped, not wanting him to touch her, angry at his cornering her and angry that a man such as Nate would be strapped with a spoiled, snotty, adopted brother like Jeff. Further she was angry that Laura and Victor had such a son. “Step away,” she demanded.

“Lily,” he said her name like a plea.

“Step away!” she repeated.

“She said, step away.”

This came in a deep, lethal voice from behind Jeff and Jeff jerked his head around just as Lily’s gaze shifted over Jeff’s shoulder and they both saw Nate.

He was standing down the hall not five paces away, his legs were planted apart and his arms were crossed on his chest. This was not a casual stance, this was a frightening one.

He was poised to strike.

And his face was horrible, even murderous, as he scowled at his brother.

Jeff didn’t move and he had his hand on the wall by Lily’s head. She ducked under his arm and fairly ran down the hall to Nate.

His stance didn’t shift but his arms came uncrossed and the moment she was in reaching distance, one shot out and pulled her against the side of his hard body.

She didn’t resist. She plastered herself there and lifted her hand to rest on his chest. For some reason she was breathing heavily.

Jeff and Nate stared at each other for what seemed like eternity to Lily.

Then Jeff said, “You should tell her, you know.”

Nate didn’t respond.

“You don’t tell her, I will,” Jeff threatened.

Nate, again, didn’t respond.

Jeff’s eyes turned Lily. “He’s adopted. He isn’t a member of this family at all.”

Lily could not even believe that Nate’s adoption was what all this was about. Her anger turned to a rage so strong, she was beside herself.

Lily leaned towards Jeff but didn’t leave Nate’s side.

“I know. He already told me,” She was pleased her voice was strong and even.

“I bet he didn’t tell you everything,” Jeff said, and he was a grown man but he still sounded like a brat.

She was pretty certain he meant about Nate’s mother being murdered. But she wasn’t going to mention that again. The last and only time Nate talked of it, she knew it was painful as it would be. So instead, she said, with all the loyalty that was born and bred in her as the granddaughter of Sarah and daughter of Will and Rebecca and with a lifetime of living amongst the people of the fine state of Indiana (which Danielle had also attacked at dinner, comments at which Lily was still smarting), “I know all I need to know.”

At Lily’s words, Nate’s arm tightened about her waist and she tilted her head to look up to him.

“I want to go,” Lily demanded.

Nate dipped his chin to look down and his eyes were glittering with something she couldn’t read. Then they left Jeff where he was standing and Nate guided her to the drawing room where the rest were sitting and having coffee.

One look at Lily’s pale, stricken face sent Victor out of his chair. Laura’s own face paled. Danielle looked on, assessing the looming situation with what appeared to be delight.

“What’s happened?” Victor asked.

“We’re leaving,” Nate answered.

“Lily, you look like you’ve seen a ghost. Nathaniel, bring her into the room, I’ll get her a drink,” Laura said, slowly coming out of her chair.

“We’re leaving,” Nate repeated implacably.

“What happened?” Victor enquired again, this time his voice a demand.

“Where’s Jeff?” Danielle asked sweetly.

Both Victor and Laura’s eyes flew to Lily’s face and they must have read the truth there because Victor viciously cursed and not under his breath.

“Nathaniel.” It was Laura’s turn to have her voice turn into a plea and Lily’s heart went out to her. How her two children could have come from her sweet body was a mystery.

“I’ll call you later,” Nate replied and that was that, no good-byes, nothing. They left.

In his sleek, purring Maserati on the way home, Lily found that although he clearly did not want to talk about it, she could not stand it. And anyway, she was angry.

“I’m sorry to say this about your very own brother, Nate, but I just do not like Jeff.”

Nate was silent.

Lily went on. “The first moment I met him, I didn’t like him and that’s never happened to me before.”

Nate remained silent.

Lily continued. “I just cannot believe he spoke that way. What’s the matter with him?”

Nate kept his silence.

As Lily had allowed her anger loose, she found it didn’t last long especially without Nate’s participation and she lapsed into silence as well.

It wasn’t until they were in his flat and Nate was preparing himself what appeared to be a very large, very stiff drink (he didn’t offer her one, by this time he knew she didn’t drink very much), that she spoke again.

“How much did you see before you arrived?”

To her surprise he answered her with, “All of it.”

Lily stared at him.

“You saw him corner me?” she asked, aghast.

He threw back the drink in one gulp. No matter how large it was, he still drained the glass.

“Why didn’t you do something?” she demanded. She was standing behind one of two leather couches that faced each other in his living room and ran perpendicular to a fireplace. Her body was stiff as a board.

This was not romantic hero stuff. Romantic heroes wouldn’t let their heroines get cornered by bratty adopted brothers and not lift a finger.

“I wanted to see what you’d do,” Nate replied.

She had no response to that. She simply kept staring. She thought perhaps she hadn’t heard him correctly.

He wasn’t looking at her. He was pouring himself another drink.

Surprisingly, he broke their tense silence. “You haven’t asked about what he said.” His eyes came to her and his were completely blank.

“What?” She was still recovering from the knowledge that he’d let Jeff corner her.

“You haven’t asked me to explain what he said.”

Lily stared at him harder, if it could be credited, and then threw her hands out in agitation, blowing a breath out to underline just how annoyed she was.

Then she started pacing.

“You already told me what you want me to know. It wasn’t any of my business in the first place, but you told me. If there’s more, you’ll tell me when you’re ready. Nothing you say or he could say would change how I feel about you –”

She stopped talking because she heard his heavy crystal glass slam down against the top of the chest where he kept his liquor and Lily, who had her back to him and was in mid-pace, whirled around.

He was stalking straight toward her.

His face was filled with…

She stared in awe.

Now Nate was staring at her like she was a juicy steak and he wasn’t a rabid dog but a starving man offered a feast, a feast that was Lily.

“What’s the matter?” she asked.

He kept coming.

She started backing up then faster as he was gaining quickly, “Nate, what’s wrong?”

He didn’t explain but when he caught her and dragged her to his bedroom, he didn’t push her onto the bed, he threw her on it. Without a further word, he made love to her in a way he’d never done before, it was fierce and violent and possessive. When she was nearly ready to climax, he stopped it, stopped her and made her say his name over and over and over again, then he finally let her finish.

It was glorious and, she felt intuitively, it was somehow immensely important and although Lily revelled in the former, she didn’t quite understand the latter.

The next time they went to Victor and Laura’s house for dinner neither Jeff nor Danielle were in attendance and Lily found that a small blessing.

Lily had tried to find a job but wasn’t having much luck. Maxine was forwarding her mail and her mortgage was due, her bills were due and she didn’t have enough money to pay them.

What she wanted most in the world was to be a writer, to live her life sitting at her computer and telling her stories. She didn’t bring her computer with her from Clevedon because she figured they’d move that later and when she confided to Nate, sleepily after he’d made love to her one evening, her dreams of being a novelist, he’d told her not to worry about getting a job and just concentrate on writing.

Easy for him to say, he didn’t have bills mounting up and no money coming in.

He’d told her he’d take care of everything but Lily couldn’t ask him for money. She wasn’t like that and further, wasn’t raised like that. She’d have to find a way to take care of her own problems.

However Nate, she was finding, was a very perceptive man. He knew as the second week slid along that something was bothering her and he asked her about it.

Lily lied. She hated it but she had to do it. She didn’t want anything, outside of his awful siblings, to mar their idyllic life. She was embarrassed she’d put herself in this position, especially the credit cards. The amounts weren’t astronomical but they were when you didn’t have any money.

So she doubled her efforts to find a job, any job.

Late the second week, she’d gone out to lunch with Laura and Laura realised something was wrong straight away.

“It’s just something I need to sort out,” Lily had responded when Laura asked.

“Is it Nathaniel?” Laura queried, her eyes gentle.

“No! Of course not, everything is fine, great, wonderful with Nate.”

Laura smiled then the smile wavered. “Is it Jeff?”

Without hesitation Lily grabbed the woman’s hand and squeezed it with reassurance and just shook her head. They didn’t need to talk about Jeff, ever.

Laura’s smile strengthened again and then she said, “Whatever it is, just tell Nathaniel. He’ll sort it out. He’s good at that kind of thing.”

She said it in a way that meant he was good at every kind of thing. Lily couldn’t help herself, she hugged the other woman and Laura returned the hug with a strength that astonished her.

Laura may have raised two terrible children but surprisingly, she was an excellent mother to the one she did not bear.

That night in bed (unless they were at the dining room table, a restaurant or at Victor and Laura’s, they seemed always to be in bed, though Lily wasn’t complaining), pressed up against Nate’s side, her arm wrapped around his stomach, she’d said, “Do you think we were a bit hasty?”

It was a silly question, obviously they were a bit hasty. They’d barely known each other and moved in together – or he’d demanded she move in with him and she’d done it.

Nate still didn’t talk very much. He didn’t share very much at all. Lily didn’t mind this. He did the same with his family, it wasn’t just her. He listened and laughed when she told stories about her family and Fazire and growing up in Indiana. But most of the time he was working. Most of the other time, they were making love. Any other time there was left over they were eating so they could have the strength to make love. Talking wasn’t exactly their strong suit.

Now she had significant money troubles and didn’t know him enough to know how to broach it with him, ask for his help.

It wasn’t that she didn’t trust him. It was that she didn’t want to take advantage of him.

He was already housing her and feeding her in great style. His flat was fantastic, she knew a bit about London real estate and it had to cost a mint, not to mention he had groceries delivered and they were from a very posh store and he had a housekeeper that came in once a week to clean and do the laundry.

Lily was certainly not going to ask him to pay her mortgage. She’d considered asking him to find her a job at Victor’s company but that was just too weird.

She’d bought her house as a screaming deal because it was so run down, it was barely worth what she paid for it. But even if it wasn’t much, it was still a mortgage.

She stopped her careening thoughts and sighed, loudly.

Then she realised Nate hadn’t answered.

“Nate?” she prompted.

It was his turn to sigh.

Then he asked, “Hasty with what?”

“Me moving in,” she told his chest.

“Lily, what’s on your mind?”

Her head came up, she looked at him and he dipped his chin to stare her straight in the eyes. He did that all the time, stared at her straight in the eyes. He was not a man who was incapable of a direct look. She liked that about him too and her father would definitely like that about him. Will always said, “Never trust a man who won’t look you in the eye.”

“What do you mean?” she asked.

To her surprise, he answered her earlier question. “Yes, it was hasty, it was rushed, it was fast, but it wasn’t wrong. You know this is good, I know this is good. That isn’t your question. Therefore I’d like to know what is your question.”

She smiled at him, she couldn’t help herself. He was very astute. Nate seemed to get down, rather easily, to the meat of the matter. It wasn’t the first time she noticed it.

“Now she’s trying to distract me with a smile,” he told the room in a harassed tone and she giggled at him, put her cheek to his chest and hugged his waist.

“It’s nothing. It doesn’t matter,” she whispered.

And it didn’t. She’d figure it out, she always did. All that mattered was him and that they were together. If she needed to, as a very last resort, she could always ask for her last wish from Fazire.

“Lily.”

She slid her head up his chest and looked at the underside of his strong jaw.

“Yes?”

“You know you can tell me anything, yes?”

She didn’t answer but she nodded her head and his hand tightened where it was resting on her hip.

She sighed.

She would figure it out and everything would be fine.

The next day the mail came including Maxine’s bunch of forwarded post. It held the notice that an article she’d submitted to a magazine was to be published. It also included a cheque. It wasn’t a great deal of money but it would cover her mortgage and the minimum payments on all her cards.

Lily was ecstatic.

“I knew everything would be all right!” she told the living room and whirled around with her excitement.

The phone rang in mid-whirl and she grabbed it, beside herself with happiness.

It was, to her shock, and delight, Fazire.

“Fazire, oh Fazire, I’m so glad you called, I can’t wait –” she began.

But he interrupted her.

“Lily-child,” he said in a voice she’d never heard from the usually happy-go-lucky or sometimes pompous-know-it-all Fazire.

Her body froze at his tone and then when she heard what he had to say, it became rock solid.

“I’ll be there right away,” she assured her dear friend when he quit talking.

Then she hung up and stood frozen for what could have been a minute, it could have been an hour.

Then she flew into action.

She called Nate’s office but his secretary was not answering and Lily didn’t want to leave a message especially not this message. She called the airline, maxed out her credit card and got a ticket. She packed everything she owned because she didn’t have much at Nate’s and she’d likely need all she had.

Then she called Laura and, to her great misfortune, Danielle answered and told Lily that Laura wasn’t home.

“Can you ask her to phone me the minute she gets in? I’m leaving Nate’s in an hour.” She pulled in a breath and begged, “Danielle, I really need you to do this, it’s urgent.”

“No problem, I can take a message, you know,” Danielle retorted acidly.

Lily expressed her gratitude, suppressed her misgivings and swallowed down her tears.

She put the phone down, picked it right back up and called Nate again.

Still no answer on his work phone. He had no direct line, everyone went through his secretary and she called again three times, no answer each time.

She called Maxine and told her what had happened but didn’t stay on the phone for long just in case Nate or Laura called.

As the time slid by, Lily was becoming frantic. Laura didn’t call, Lily couldn’t get through to Nate and she had to get to Indiana immediately. She had to get to Fazire, he wouldn’t know what to do. He wasn’t even human. He was all alone in that rambling limestone house for the first time without his Becky.

She gulped down the emotion that swelled in her throat at the thought of her mother which led to thoughts of her father and she wrote a note to Nate. She was just signing it when the intercom rang, announcing someone was downstairs waiting to be let in.

Hoping it was Laura for a surprise visit, Lily flew to the intercom.

Seeing as it was the absolutely most unlucky day of her life, and that was an understatement, it was Jeff.

Lily’s heart plummeted.

“Lily, don’t hang up!” Jeff cried urgently. “I’m here to apologise. Promise. I was out of line.”

She hesitated, stared at the phone across the room for a moment, begging it to ring.

It didn’t.

Her last chance was telling Jeff. He at least seemed to like her unlike Danielle and he was there to apologise. Maybe he wasn’t the jerk she thought he was.

“Come on up Jeff,” she said and buzzed him in.

She had to leave in five minutes. She had her bags packed and at the door and while she was waiting for Jeff, she called the doorman to hail a cab for Heathrow.

There was a knock on the door and Lily moved to it to let him in. Jeff saw her bags immediately and his head snapped from them to her, his eyes alight.

She was too wired, trying to fight the tears crawling up her throat and her frenzy at needing to get word to Nate or Laura, to notice.

“What’s happened Lily?” he asked softly.

She stared at him and then it happened. The dam broke; she could hold it back no longer. She burst into tears. He pulled her into his arms and stroked her back.

“Tell me, Lily, tell me what he’s done,” he whispered encouragingly.

She just shook her head and said in a broken voice, “It’s not Nate. It’s my parents. They died in a plane crash yesterday. Both of them.”

His arms tightened.

“Oh Lily,” Jeff murmured and she could swear he actually sounded upset for her.

She pulled away, dashing her hands on her tear-stained cheeks.

“I have to go,” she announced urgently and looked at her watch. “Now!” she cried in panic. “I haven’t been able to get hold of Nate or your mother. Jeff, you must phone Nate. Tell him. You must. Please. Tell him I’ll call him later, in a few days. Promise me.”

His hand reached up and touched her cheek where a tear was sliding down.

“I promise,” he whispered.

She threw her arms around him and hugged him tight, “Thank you.”

Then she grabbed her bags and tore out the door to go home.

To Fazire.

Jeff watched the door slam behind Lily and saw the note on the table.

He calmly walked over and read it.

He thought, vaguely, that it was rather sad.

Then he bunched it in a ball and put it in his pocket.

Nate, he knew, was moving in a few days.

Lily just told him she wouldn’t call for a few days.

There wasn’t much time.

He walked through his brother’s posh flat and searched for anything that she may have left behind.

He found a bottle of perfume on a bureau, a pair of earrings on the bedside table and a lone nightgown, the only thing in an otherwise empty drawer.

That was it.

He shoved these in a trash bag, carried them out of the flat and deposited them in the first dustbin he found.

Then he called his sister.