Tripping With Dick Vitale
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Dumb diti dumb dang dang di dumb
2 bums in an alley with a bottle of rum
1 bum said look Jack I'm the ****
Put his knees to his ears and sucked his own ****
My mothers crazy I think she sniffs glue
She never liked me and I know that's true
Kicked me out the crib becuz I got a tattoo
No one loves me and no one cares
And all I ever get is funny stares
I can't help it if I'm nothin but a wino
So I hang at the zoo chillin with the rhinos
Stealin' bottles of booze outta A & P
I know a girl at Denny's and I always eat free
Got the same birthdate as Thomas Crapper
For Christmas I bought the old man the Clapper
I'm so dapper you can call me Dan
But they call me round eye when I'm chilin in Japan
Got a bad *** ***** adn she ain't no dike
But **** that ho and let me tell ya what I like
I like bean burritos from Taco Bell
I like trippin on acid with **** Vitale
My hair ain't plastic and my clothes aren't clashin'
I write my rhymes on a schooner in a 90's fashion
Took too many many trip and now I can's stop trippin
My mellow D. killed a rat in the kitchen
You think you toke tuff I'd disagree
Nobody blows more doobs than Richard D.
I get ill on hoes who I know ain't fertile
I'm a real jet setter like Cecil turtle
I'm down with Bill Bands so **** Joe Glover
And while I'm at it mother **** fat *** Sally Struthers
You look fine girl kinda undercover
But I can't **** ya 'cause you look like my mother
I said dang digee dang di dang dang
It ain't Eric Estrada or cool and The Gang
You know I hand in the Clem chillin on the strip
With all them mother ****ers who slang that ****
You know I'm a pimp hold my **** like a holster
You sing it "all the girls want a kid rock poster"
Lifes a big joke and that's how it strikes me
But **** it 'cause I know "Somebody up there likes me."
*******s are only *******s, fo sho'