If you only read the books that everyone else is reading, you can only think what everyone else is thinking.

Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood

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My Boy Bill
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I wonder what he'll think of me
 
I guess he'll call me "the old man"
 
I guess he'll think I can lick
 
Ev'ry other fella's father
 
Well, I can!
 
I bet that he turns out to be
 
The spittin' image of his dad
 
But he'll have more common sense
 
Than his puddin'-headed father ever had
 
 
 
I'll teach him to wrassle and dive through a wave
 
When we go in the morning for our swim
 
His mother can teach him the way to behave
 
But she won't make a sissy out o' him
 
Not him! Not my boy! Not Bill!
 
 
 
Bill. I will see that he is named after me, I will.
 
My boy, Bill, he'll be tall and tough as a tree, will Bill!
 
Like a tree he'll grow with his head held high
 
And his feet planted firm on the ground
 
And you won't see nobody dare to try to boss or toss him
around!
 
No pot-bellied, baggy-eyed bully'll boss him around
 
I don't give a damn what he does as long as he does what he
likes!
 
He can sit on his tail or work on a rail with a hammer and
hammer in spikes!
 
He can ferry a boat on a river or peddle a pack on his back
 
Or work up and down the streets of a town with a whip and a
horse and a hack
 
He can haul a scow along a canal, run a cow around a corral
 
Or maybe bark for a carousel
 
Of course, it takes talent to do that well
 
He might be a champ of the heavyweights or a fella that sells
you glue
 
Or President of the United States, that'd be all right, too
 
[Spoken:]
 
His mother would like that, but he wouldn't be President unless
he wanted to be
 
Not Bill!
 
My boy, Bill he'll be tall and as tough as a tree, will Bill
 
Like a tree he'll grow with his head held high
 
And his feet planted firm on the ground
 
And you won't see nobody dare to try to boss or toss him
around!
 
No fat-bottomed, flabby-faced, pot-bellied, baggy-eyed bully'll
boss him around
 
And I'll be damned if he'll marry his boss's daughter
 
A skinny-lipped virgin with blood like water
 
Who'll give him a peck and call it a kiss
 
And look in his eyes through a *lorgnette*
 
Hey, why am I takin' on like this?
 
My kid ain't even been born yet!
 
I can see him when he's seventeen or so and startin' in to go
with a girl
 
I can give him lots of pointers, very sound, on the way to get
'round any girl
 
I can tell him
 
Wait a minute!
 
Could it be?
 
What the hell!
 
What if he is a girl?
 
You can have fun with a son
 
But you got to be a father to a girl
 
She mighn't be so bad,at that
 
A kid with ribbons in her hair!
 
A kind of neat and petite little tin-type of her mother!
 
What a pair!
 
My little girl, pink and white as peaches and cream is she
 
My little girl is half again as bright as girls were meant to
be!
 
Dozens of boys pursue her, many a likely lad
 
Does what he can to woo her from her faithful dad
 
She has a few pink and white young fellas of two and three
 
But my little girl gets hungry ev'ry night and she comes home to
me!
 
I gotta get ready before she comes
 
Gotta make certain that she won't be dragged up in slums with a
lot o' bums like me
 
She's gotta be sheltered and fed and dressed in the best that
money can buy!
 
I never knew how to get money but, I'll try, by God! I'll
try!
 
I'll go out and make it or steal it
 
Or take it or die