Americans like fat books and thin women.
Russell Baker
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I'm the Only One
Trees are things that move
And tell you when the wind blows
Flowers are things that bloom
And tell you when the winter goes
Sand is a thing that tells you when
To empty your shoes
And I'm the only one
You tell all this to
Ralph is your cat who tells you that
He's got to go outside
Jane is your friends who tells you when
You ought not to cry
I know Boo she knows when you are
Feeling blue
But I'm the only one
You tell all this to
I'm the only one
You tell all this to
Fear is a word you hear
All alone in the dark
Fun is a day in the sun
With Ralph in the park
Happy's the time you find
A love that is true
And I'm the only one
Kathy tells all this to
I'm the only one
You tell all this to