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Cocksucker Blues
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Well, I'm a lonesome schoolboy
And I just came into town
Yeah, I'm a lonesome schoolboy
And I just came into town
Well, I heard so much about London
I decided to check it out
 
Well, I wait in Leicester Square
With a come-hither look in my eye
Yeah, I'm leaning on Nelson's Column
But all I do is talk to the lions
 
[Chorus]
Oh, where can I get my **** sucked?
Where can I get my *** ****ed?
I may have no money
But I know where to put it every time
 
Well, I asked a young policeman
If he'd only lock me up for the night
Well, I've had pigs in the farmyard
Some of them, some of them, they're alright
Well, he ****ed me with his truncheon
And his helmet was way too tight
 
[Chorus]
 
I'm a lonesome schoolboy in your town
I'm a lonesome schoolboy