Chapter 5
he noise hit them as soon as they were through the ticket gates. Students from a nearby university – all of them boys – were practically falling over each other to hand flyers to the girls from Seika Girls College. ‘Join our tennis club!’ they shouted. ‘Join our skiing club!’ Their voices had long since gone hoarse.
Eriko succeeded in making it out of the station without accepting a single flyer. She and Yukiho exchanged glances and laughed.
‘That was impressive,’ said Eriko. ‘I wonder how many different schools were there.’
‘Today’s the most important day of the year for them,’ Yukiho told her. ‘A word of advice: never settle for a flyer boy.’ She brushed back her long hair.
The school buildings of Seika Girls College stood in the middle of a residential area that was mostly newer houses, with the occasional sprawling old walled-in property. It was a small college with only three departments: English Literature, Home Economics, and Athletics – meaning that there were usually very few students in what was ostensibly a college town. This kept things quiet, with the exception of recruitment day, when students from nearby men’s universities competed to attract girls from Seika to join their clubs. Boys from nearby Eimei University were thickest on the ground. They loitered along the street leading to the school, casting about with hungry eyes for likely targets. When they spotted a freshman, they launched into their pitch.
‘You don’t even have to really be in the club if you don’t want to,’ shouted one as they passed. ‘Just come to the parties. You don’t even need to pay dues!’
It took the girls almost twenty minutes to navigate a path that only took five on a normal day. They seemed to be attracting far more than their share of attention, but Eriko knew all too well the boys were there for Yukiho, not her. So had it always been, ever since they were in middle school.
The frantic invitations died down once they were through the college gates. Eriko and Yukiho headed for the gymnasium. Opening ceremonies would be held here this year.
Folding chairs stretched out in long rows behind department names posted on placards. The two girls sat down in the row for English Lit. There should have been about forty new students in the department, but only half the seats were filled. Students weren’t under any particular obligation to attend the opening ceremony, which meant that most would be arriving late, just in time for official school club recruitments, Eriko imagined.
The opening ceremony consisted of greetings from the president and the department heads. The speeches were painfully boring; it was all Eriko could do to stifle her yawns.
Outside the gymnasium, tables from each school club had been lined up on the campus lawn. There were some boys from Eimei here too, though energy levels were far more subdued than they had been that morning at the station.
‘Going to join any clubs?’ Eriko asked Yukiho as they walked outside.
‘Maybe,’ she said, passing her uninterested gaze over several of the club posters.
‘There’s an awful lot of tennis clubs – and skiing,’ Eriko noted. It seemed those two activities made up about half of all the clubs. She guessed these clubs were less about community and school spirit, and more about skipping out on class and scoring free trips to the mountains.
‘Not interested,’ said Yukiho.
‘No?’
‘I’d just get sunburned.’
‘True.’
‘Did you know that your skin remembers the exact amount of ultraviolet radiation it’s absorbed? Even if a tan fades, the damage is done. And when you get older, you’ll pay in wrinkles. They say tans are for the young, but if you ask me, the young are the last people who should be getting tans.’
Eriko looked over at her friend, her skin as white as the ‘yuki’ meaning ‘snow’ in her name, and agreed that she had something worth protecting.
The boys began their approach, like fruit flies to a banana. They invited them to play tennis, go skiing, play golf, go surfing – all things that would give you a serious tan, Eriko thought bemusedly. Yukiho wasn’t paying them any attention. She had stopped, her eyes looking up at a poster. The sign read:
Ballroom Dance
(A joint club with Eimei University)
Two girls, new recruits by the look of them, were talking with the members by the club table. There was no sports paraphernalia here – everyone behind the table, Seika girls and Eimei boys both, wore dark, stylish jackets. They seemed more adult and refined than the students in the other clubs.
The boys had already noticed Yukiho stopping and one of them approached almost immediately.
‘Might you be interested in a dance?’ he asked. He was handsome, and there was a deliberate precision to his words.
‘A little,’ Yukiho said honestly. ‘But I’ve never tried it before, and I really don’t know much about it.’
‘Everyone has to start somewhere,’ the boy said. ‘But don’t worry, you’ll be dancing in a month.’
‘Would it be all right just to watch?’
‘Of course.’ He led Yukiho over to the desk as they talked and introduced her to the girl members from Seika. Almost as an afterthought, he looked back around at Eriko. ‘How about you?’
‘No, I’m fine.’
‘OK!’
He went straight back to Yukiho, afraid that other boys might angle in on his catch, Eriko thought. Already three other boys were crowding around her.
‘Why don’t you audit?’ said a voice from behind Eriko. She jolted to one side and glanced around to see a taller boy looking down at her.
‘No, really,’ she said, ‘I’m fine.’
‘Why not?’ he asked with a smile.
‘I just don’t think dancing is my thing. I’m not suited for it. And if they found out, my family would go into shock.’
‘There’s no such thing as being suited or unsuited for dancing. Isn’t your friend going to audit too?’ He glanced towards where Yukiho was standing near the club table. ‘Come along, just once. Take a look. If you don’t like it, you don’t like it – we won’t force you to join just because you came to watch.’
‘Really, it’s OK.’
‘You don’t want to dance?’
‘It’s not that. In fact, I think it would be nice to be able to dance. I just don’t think I’m cut out for it.’ She shook her head. ‘No, I’m definitely not.’
‘Oh, I doubt that,’ the tall student said, giving her a suspicious look. But his eyes were smiling.
‘I – I’d get dizzy right away.’
‘Dizzy?’
‘Seasick. I’m just not very good at swaying from side to side.’
The boy raised an eyebrow. ‘What does that have to do with dancing?’
‘Well,’ Eriko said, lowering her voice, ‘don’t the boys whirl the girls around a lot? Like that scene from Gone with the Wind when Scarlett dances with Rhett Butler. Just watching that made me feel a little sick to my stomach.’
Eriko had meant to be serious, but it was hard to keep a straight face when the boy started to laugh midway through her explanation.
‘A lot of people get nervous when you mention the word “dance”, but that’s the first time I’ve ever heard that excuse.’
‘But I’m not joking. I really am worried.’
‘I don’t believe it.’
‘Honest!’
He shook his head. ‘You owe it to yourself to at least see what you’re so frightened of,’ he said, taking Eriko by the hand and pulling her over to the club table.
Yukiho had just finished signing up to audit. She was smiling at something the three boys behind the table were saying. When she saw Eriko get dragged over, her eyes widened in surprise.
‘Another for auditing,’ the tall student said.
‘What’s Kazunari doing recruiting?’ whispered one of the girls at the table.
‘I believe this fine young lady has misconceptions about dance that need correcting,’ he said, flashing white teeth at Eriko.
Dance club ended precisely at five, after which several of the boys from Eimei would invite new recruits who showed potential out to a café. This café date was the sole purpose for which many of them had joined the club in the first place.
Tonight, Kazunari Shinozuka was in a hotel in Osaka. He was sitting on a sofa next to the window, his notebook open on his lap with a list of twenty-three names. Not bad, he thought. It wasn’t an outrageously large number, but it was more than the year before. The question was how many would actually join.
‘There were a lot more boys this year than usual,’ came a voice from the bed.
Kanae Kurahashi lit her cigarette and blew out a stream of grey smoke. Her bare shoulder was exposed, though she held a blanket over her breasts. The dim light of the nightstand lamp left the exotic features of her face in shadow.
‘You think?’
‘Don’t you?’
‘Seemed the same as always to me.’
Kanae shook her head. Her long hair swayed. ‘No, today was definitely different. And I know who’s to blame.’
‘Do tell.’
‘That Karasawa girl. She’s joining, right?’
‘Karasawa?’ Kazunari traced down the names in his notebook with a finger. ‘Yukiho Karasawa… English Lit.’
‘You don’t remember her? That’s hard to believe.’
‘No, I remember her. Though I don’t remember her face that well, to tell you the truth. We had a lot of people audit today.’
Kanae snorted. ‘Guess she’s not your type.’
‘What type is she?’
‘A perfect lady. You like the ones with imperfections, the bad girls. Like me.’
‘I like a well-bred lady as much as the next man. Anyway, what makes you so sure she’s a “lady”?’
‘You should’ve seen Nagayama. He was practically beside himself, saying she was definitely a virgin.’ Kanae chuckled.
‘That proves nothing except that he’s an idiot.’
Kazunari took a bite of the sandwich he’d ordered from room service and thought back on the students who came to observe the club that day.
It was true that he didn’t really remember Yukiho Karasawa that well. They’d only exchanged a couple of words and he hadn’t spent much time watching her move, so he’d never picked up on this ‘perfect lady’ thing Kanae was going on about. He did remember Nagayama being excited, but hadn’t known why at the time.
The girl he remembered was Eriko. She was the kind of girl who didn’t put on any make-up, wore practical clothes, spoke plainly… and was still beautiful for it.
He’d seen her waiting for a friend – that was Yukiho, now that he thought of it – to finish writing her name on the sign-up sheet. She didn’t seem to notice the other people walking by her or shouts from the other tables. It was almost as if she enjoyed the act of waiting. She made him think of a weed that had suddenly bloomed and now stood swaying in the breeze by the roadside, a tiny flower without a proper name – at least none anyone knew.
And he had reached out to pick that flower. Being the head of the dance club, he wasn’t responsible for recruiting. But Eriko was unique. Her reactions to the things he said were completely unexpected, each one. He found the way she talked and the way she looked entirely fresh.
He’d thought about her all during the class audit that day, though he couldn’t explain why. His eyes kept being drawn to her.
Maybe it was because she looked the most serious of all the potential recruits that day. While others had sat in the folding chairs they’d put out, she stood until the very end. Kazunari had walked up to her once the session was over to see what she thought.
‘It was incredible,’ Eriko said, clasping her hands together. ‘I used to think ballroom dancing was old-fashioned, but watching them move – it was like they were born to dance.’
‘No one’s born to dance,’ said Kazunari.
‘They could have fooled me.’
Kazunari shook his head. ‘None of us could dance when we started, and most of us won’t go on to be dancers.’
‘Then why do it at all?’
He smiled. ‘You’d be surprised how many opportunities come up to dance. But even if you only got one, wouldn’t you want to be ready for it? Know how to dance, and you’ll dance through life.’
‘I like that,’ Eriko smiled.
‘It’s just something cheesy the old dance coach used to say.’
‘It’s not cheesy.’ Eriko shook her head. ‘It’s excellent encouragement, and I won’t forget it.’
‘You mean you’ll join the club?’
‘I will. We decided to join together.’ She looked over at her friend Yukiho.
‘Great. Then we look forward to having you.’ Kazunari looked towards the other girl.
‘Thank you.’ Yukiho bowed curtly before meeting his eyes.
It was the first time he’d seen Yukiho Karasawa straight on. She was pretty, he had to admit, with very delicate features. But there was something else, too. There are thorns in her eyes – that was the only way he could express it. For a moment, he thought she might have felt left out because he spoke to her friend first and not to her, but as she smiled, he realised the thorns were always there.
A true lady would never have eyes like that.
Two weeks had passed since the opening ceremony. It was Friday afternoon and Eriko and Yukiho were on the train to Eimei University for their fourth dance club practice since school began.
‘Please let me dance well today,’ said Eriko, hands pressed together before her in mock prayer.
‘You are dancing well,’ Yukiho said.
‘Hardly. My feet won’t go the way I tell them to. I keep feeling like I’m going to trip over myself.’
‘Don’t let Kazunari hear you saying that. You’re his beacon of hope, you know.’
‘Thanks. That just makes it worse.’
‘They say you’re the only one he’s ever personally recruited. You have a reputation to live up to,’ Yukiho said, giving her a teasing look.
‘Stop it, Yuki, I’m really bad under pressure. That, and I have no idea why he picked me in the first place.’
‘Because he likes you, silly.’
‘Erm, no, sorry. That sort of thing might happen in your world, but not in mine. And isn’t he dating Kanae?’
‘Ah yes, the lovely Miss Kurahashi.’ Yukiho nodded. ‘They’ve been a thing for quite some time, apparently.’
‘Nagayama says they’ve been dating since they were freshmen.’
‘I guess he moves quick when he sees something he likes.’
‘Actually,’ Eriko said, ‘I heard Kanae made the moves first.’
Yukiho shrugged to indicate she couldn’t care less. ‘She sure hasn’t gone out of her way to hide the fact that Kazunari’s her property.’
Kazunari and Kanae’s relationship was public knowledge. If the new recruits hadn’t known it going in to the first day of dance club practice, they knew it soon after by the way the two talked to each other and the way they danced close, hands on hips, faces practically touching.
If it had been an intentional display on Kanae’s part, she’d certainly made her point. Eriko barely knew Kazunari and even she felt a little jealous when she saw them together. Not that she had a chance in the first place. Kazunari was the eldest son of the senior managing director of Shinozuka Pharmaceuticals, one of the top pharmaceutical companies in Japan, and the current CEO was his uncle – which made him nobility as far as she was concerned.
They got off the train. Outside the station, a warm breeze brushed her cheeks.
‘I’m probably going to have to leave before the end of class today,’ said Yukiho. ‘Sorry in advance.’
‘Going on a date?’
‘I wish. Just an errand.’
Eriko shrugged. Yukiho had started doing these errands a while ago, leaving Eriko to fend for herself. Eriko had asked her once where she went, and Yukiho had refused to speak to her for nearly a week. It was, to date, the only time their friendship ever soured. She hadn’t asked again.
Kazunari had been too lost in thought to notice the tiny droplets gathering on the windscreen. Just when he realised it was raining, it started coming down harder, obscuring his view of the road. He reached to the left side of the steering wheel for the wiper lever, then, realising his error, shifted his grip and went for the right side. Even imported cars that managed to put the steering wheel on the right still had their levers reversed. His month-old Volkswagen Golf was no exception.
Outside the school gate he saw students running for the station, paper bags and satchels held over their heads in lieu of umbrellas.
Then he saw Eriko. She was walking at her usual pace, seeming not to care that her white jacket was getting wet. Her constant companion, Yukiho Karasawa, was conspicuously absent.
Kazunari pulled over towards the kerb, slowing until he matched Eriko’s speed. She didn’t seem to notice. She just kept the same pace, a mysterious smile on her lips. Kazunari gave two taps of his horn and she looked up. He lowered the left-hand passenger window.
‘Hey! Need a lift? You look like a drowned rat!’
Eriko didn’t seem to appreciate the joke. Her expression hardened, and she started walking faster. Kazunari gave it a little more gas to keep pace.
‘Hey, don’t run! What’s wrong?’ he called out.
She walked even faster.
She’s taking this the wrong way, he realised.
‘Hey Eriko! It’s me, Kazunari,’ he called out, and finally she stopped and turned with a surprised look on her face.
‘Believe me,’ he said as she came over to the side of the car, ‘if I was out cruising for chicks, I’d do it when it wasn’t raining.’
She smiled, the rain running through the matted hair on her forehead and down her cheeks to drip from her chin.
Eriko had a floral-patterned handkerchief. She used it to wipe her hands and face, then ran it over her neck. She’d taken off her drenched jacket and placed it over her bare knees. Kazunari told her she was welcome to put it on the back seat, but she declined on the grounds that it would only get his seat wet.
‘Sorry, I didn’t realise it was you. It was too dark to see your face.’
‘That’s OK. The way I was calling out like that, no wonder you got the wrong idea.’ Kazunari eased the car around a tight corner. He was taking her home.
‘It’s just, sometimes it happens and you have to be careful.’
‘Strange men in cars call out to you often?’
‘Well, no, not me. But when I’m walking with Yukiho…’
‘Speaking of which, where is she?’
‘She had an errand to run.’
‘That explains why you were alone. Still,’ Kazunari glanced over her, ‘why were you walking? Why weren’t you running? Everyone else around you was.’
‘Well, I wasn’t in a particular hurry.’
‘But you were getting wet.’
‘If I ran, it would just make the rain hit my face harder. Like that,’ she said, pointing at the windscreen. What had been a light drizzle was now a full-on downpour. Droplets bounced off the glass and rivulets streaked behind the sweeping path of the wipers.
‘But wouldn’t it reduce the amount of time you were getting rained on?’
‘Believe me, I’ve thought about this. At the speed I run, it’d only cut three minutes off the trip, tops. I don’t want to run along a wet road for three minutes. I might trip and fall.’
Kazunari laughed.
‘I’m not kidding. I trip all the time. I even fell over today in class and stepped on Yamamoto’s foot. He pretended it didn’t hurt, but I saw the look in his eyes – the look of a man in true pain,’ Eriko said, rubbing her legs where they emerged from her pleated skirt to warm them.
Kazunari chuckled. ‘Getting used to the dancing?’
‘A little. But I’m still terrible at it. Yukiho, she’s practically a pro already.’ She sighed.
‘You’ll get better in no time.’
‘I wonder.’
‘It’d be nice.’
Kazunari stopped at a red light and took a sidelong glance at Eriko. She had hardly any make-up on, as usual. In the light from the street lamps, her skin looked perfectly smooth. Like porcelain, he thought. A few strands of wet hair were stuck to her cheek. He reached out and brushed them aside. She flinched away.
‘Sorry, you had some hair on your face.’
Eriko brushed her hair back behind her ears. Even in the dim car interior, he could see her blush. The light turned green and the car lurched back into movement.
‘How long have you worn your hair like that?’ Kazunari asked, his eyes on the road ahead.
‘This?’ She put a hand to her wet head. ‘Since not long before graduating from high school, I guess.’
‘I thought so. That’s a Seiko cut, right? Like the singer’s? Pretty popular these days – maybe too popular. Everyone’s got it, whether it suits them or not.’
It was a semi-long cut, with a fringe left to hang and the sides brushed back.
‘You don’t think it suits me?’
‘Well…’ Kazunari shifted gears before saying, ‘To be brutally honest, no, not really.’
‘Oh.’ Eriko began brushing her hair back with her hands again.
‘You like it?’
She shrugged. ‘I don’t really care that much. It was Yukiho’s idea.’
‘Her again. Please don’t tell me you do everything she says.’
‘Of course not.’
Kazunari glanced over and saw Eriko looking down at her lap. An idea occurred to him. He glanced at his watch. It was a little before seven.
‘Do you have plans tonight? I forget if you have a part-time job or anything.’
‘No, nothing. Why?’
‘Think you might join me for a little?’
‘Where are you going?’
‘Don’t worry, it’s nothing weird,’ Kazunari said, putting his foot down.
He stopped at a phone booth and made a quick call, but he didn’t tell Eriko who he was calling. He saw her looking a little worried and smiled.
They stopped in front of a building – their destination was on the first floor. Eriko took one look at the sign and took a step back. ‘A beauty salon? Why?’
‘I’ve been going here for years,’ he told her. ‘They’re very good. You don’t have anything to worry about.’ He put his hand on her back and gently pushed her towards the open door.
The hairdresser was a man in his thirties with a little growth of bristle beneath his nose. Several awards hung on the wall – apparently he was something of a celebrity in the beauty salon world. ‘Ah, there you are,’ he said when he saw Kazunari walk in.
‘Sorry it took so long.’
‘Not at all. I can always spare a few minutes for you, Kazunari.’
‘I was hoping you might have an idea for her hair,’ Kazunari said, indicating Eriko with his hand. ‘Something that suits her.’
‘Excellent,’ said the hairdresser, taking a long look at Eriko’s face, his imagination working. Eriko blushed.
‘Also,’ Kazunari turned to the hairdresser’s female assistant standing nearby, ‘maybe give her a little make-up? Something to go with the new look?’
‘Absolutely,’ the assistant said, her eyes sparkling.
‘Kazunari?’ Eriko said feeling extremely out of place. ‘I actually don’t have that much money with me today. And I never wear make-up —’
‘Don’t worry about that,’ he said. ‘Just sit and let them work their magic.’
‘But I’m afraid my folks will worry – I didn’t tell them I was going to a beauty salon.’
Kazunari looked back at the assistant. ‘Can we borrow your phone?’
She brought them the phone sitting on the counter. It had a long cord so customers could take calls while having their hair done. Kazunari held it out to Eriko.
‘Go ahead, call home. Tell them you’re stopping for a haircut. I’m sure they’ll understand.’
She took the receiver. The hesitation was plain on her face, but she seemed to have accepted that resistance was futile.
Kazunari sat on the sofa in the corner of the shop to wait. A part-time employee who looked like she was still in high school brought him coffee. He was surprised to see the girl’s hair was very close-cut up the sides, almost a buzz cut, and wondered if that was going to be the next fad.
Kazunari couldn’t wait to see Eriko’s transformation. If his instinct was right they would be uncovering her true potential tonight.
He wasn’t sure what it was that drew him to Eriko but he’d been obsessed from the moment he laid eyes on her. All he could say for certain was that their relationship – if that’s what this was – was one he had initiated. There had been no introduction. She hadn’t come on to him. He had spotted her, and that satisfied him greatly. He couldn’t say the same about any of the girls he’d dated thus far.
Now that he thought about it, the same thing was true about more than just girls in his life. His toys, his clothes – everything had always been given to him before he even had a chance to want it on his own. He wondered if he ever would have wanted any of it, really.
His choice of an economics major at Eimei had been his parents’ suggestion and he’d only chosen that school because several of his relatives were alumni. He hadn’t chosen to join the dance club, either. It had been the only club allowed to him. His father was of the opinion that clubs in general were detrimental to studies. Dance was permitted because it would give him a leg up in the social situations he was sure to face in his future with the family company.
I didn’t even choose Kanae.
A beautiful recruit from Seika, Kanae had had everyone vying to be her partner during the first recital, but she had made a beeline for Kazunari and told him, in no uncertain terms, that she wanted him to pick her. Not that he had minded at the time. He’d had his eye on her already and once they were partners, the rest was easy. A few late nights at practice and they were in love.
Am I in love?
Kazunari had to admit the possibility that what he felt wasn’t love. That maybe he was just excited to be sleeping with a pretty girl. As evidence, whenever there was something else – anything else – to do, he would let her slide. It wasn’t hard for him to do this. All she asked of him was that he call her at least once a day, but he often felt even that was too much.
Nor was it clear that she loved him. Maybe she just liked the access to brand-name fashion his wallet provided. She talked a lot about their future, but what if it wasn’t about being his wife? What if it was just about being part of his family?
At any rate, he had already decided it was high time to break things off. She had clung particularly close to him in practice today, marking her territory. He’d had just about enough of that.
He smiled and took a sip of coffee when he noticed the assistant approach.
‘All done,’ she announced.
‘How are we looking?’
‘You’ll have to see for yourself.’ She winked.
Eriko was sitting in the hairdresser’s chair in front of a large mirror. Kazunari walked over slowly. When he saw her reflection he actually caught his breath. Her hair had been cut to just over shoulder-length. It was curved to show the bottom of her ears, yet not in a boyish way at all. The look was very feminine, and with just a dusting of make-up her face was stunning. They had really brought out the beauty of her skin. Her eyes stirred something inside him.
‘Wow,’ he breathed.
‘It doesn’t look funny?’ asked Eriko.
‘Far from it.’ He shook his head firmly and looked over at the hairdresser. ‘That’s really impressive.’
‘I had excellent material to work with,’ said the hairdresser, smiling.
‘Try standing,’ Kazunari said.
She stood, looking up at him a bit nervously.
Kazunari gazed at her for a long while before he asked, ‘Any plans tomorrow?’
‘Tomorrow?’
‘Saturday. You have morning classes?’
‘I didn’t take any Saturday classes…’
‘Perfect. Going anyplace? Meeting any friends?’
‘No, nothing, but —’
‘Then you’re with me. We have a few places we need to go.’
‘What? Where?’
‘You’ll find out tomorrow.’
Kazunari looked between Eriko’s face and her new haircut. The transformation was more dramatic than he’d dared to imagine. She had a unique, individual beauty, and his mind jumped ahead to tomorrow’s date as he began to imagine what ensemble would work well with her new look.
Eriko walked into class on Monday morning to find Yukiho already there. Her friend looked up at her and her eyes went wide. There was a long silence.
‘What happened to you?’ Yukiho managed at length. The surprise in her voice was something entirely new to Eriko.
‘It’s a long story,’ Eriko said, sitting down beside her. She noticed other students taking astonished looks in her direction. Yes, this was definitely new territory. The attention felt great.
‘When did you get your hair cut?’
‘Friday.’ She smiled. ‘In the rain.’
As Eriko related the events of the day, Yukiho’s usual calm and collected veneer broke into surprise, which eventually transformed into a smile.
‘I knew Kazunari had a thing for you,’ she said.
‘Maybe,’ Eriko said, her fingers playing with a strand of hair by her cheek.
‘So where’d you go on Saturday?’
On Saturday afternoon, Kazunari had taken her to a boutique selling expensive designer clothes. He walked in like he owned the place and talked to the assistant there as if they were old friends. It was the hairdresser’s all over again. ‘Show us some clothes that that will suit her,’ he said.
The elegantly dressed assistant – it turned out she was the owner – immediately sprang into action. Giving orders to her staff, she had them bring out ensemble after ensemble. For more than an hour Eriko had the run of the dressing room.
When she’d heard they were going to a boutique, Eriko had pictured getting herself something modest, a simple dress she could wear at formal occasions, but when she saw the price tags on the clothes she was trying on, she nearly fainted. She didn’t have anywhere near that kind of money, and if she had she certainly wouldn’t be spending it on clothes.
She whispered this to Kazunari, and he shook his head. ‘Don’t you worry,’ he told her, ‘this is my treat.’
‘No, I can’t accept. It’s too expensive.’
He smiled. ‘A word of advice: when a man says he’s going to give you something, accept it. Don’t worry. I’m not looking for any favours. I just think a beautiful girl should have beautiful clothes.’
She blushed. ‘But you paid for the hairdresser’s yesterday and everything.’
‘Of course I did. After all, it’s your hair and I practically forced you to cut it. There’s an upside for me too, you know. I can’t be seen walking around with a girl wearing a Seiko cut and dressed like an insurance salesman.’
‘Was I really that bad?’
‘To be brutally honest, yes.’
Eriko sighed. She had considered herself fashionable.
‘Right now, you’re just building your cocoon,’ said Kazunari from the other side of the changing room door. ‘You have no idea how beautiful you’ll become. I just want to give you that chance. I want to help you see.’
‘Hmm, I’m not convinced this caterpillar’s coming out a butterfly.’
‘You will, I guarantee it,’ he said, handing her another outfit and closing the curtain.
She eventually allowed him to buy her a single dress. Kazunari urged her to try one or two others, but she put her foot down. She was worried how she would explain even one dress to her mother, especially after the surprise when she’d got home from the hairdresser’s the day before.
‘Just tell her you bought it at a clothes swap at school,’ Kazunari said with a laugh. Then he added, ‘It really looks good on you, you know. You look like an actress.’
‘Hardly,’ Eriko said, blushing as she looked in the mirror because he wasn’t entirely wrong.
‘It’s like a Cinderella story,’ Yukiho said, shaking her head as Eriko finished her account. ‘I really don’t know what to say.’
‘I know, I thought I was dreaming, too. And… I’m a little worried.’
‘What could you possibly be worried about?’
‘It’s just, the makeover and the clothes… It’s a lot to get from someone.’
‘But you like him, don’t you?’
‘I think so.’
Yukiho shook her head, and said, gently, ‘If you could see your smile right now, you’d know.’
The following day was Tuesday practice at Eimei, where Eriko’s new look caused a stir amongst the other members of the dance club. It wasn’t just the girls, either. The Eimei boys flocked to her when she walked in, all wanting to know what had happened – did she get a new job over the weekend? Did she join a new club? Did she get dumped, or did she shack up with someone new?
For the first time in Eriko’s life, people were talking about her, not Yukiho. A circle had formed around her. When she looked up, Yukiho was standing a little way off, smiling. It was all a bit unreal. Part of her wondered if the sudden shift might make Yukiho jealous, but another part of her was even more jealous of Yukiho for having had this attention since the day they met.
Not everyone was pleased with her sudden transformation. Some of the older girls were pointedly ignoring her. Kanae had given her a particularly dark look and muttered something about children playing dress-up. This reaction was still something of a relief. Apparently she hadn’t caught on to the fact that it was her own boyfriend who had brought this change upon Eriko.
Still, she had clearly upset the balance of power in the club, and retribution was swift. Even before practice started, one of the sophomores called Eriko over.
‘Think you can tally up the club’s accounts?’ asked the long-haired girl, handing her a brown bag. ‘Everything’s in here: the ledger and all our receipts from last year. Just write down the dates and the amounts and work it out by month. Got it?’
‘When do you need this by?’
‘By the end of practice today, if you can.’ The sophomore glanced back over her shoulder. ‘Kanae’s orders.’
‘Right… OK.’
Once the sophomore left, Yukiho came over to Eriko. ‘I can’t believe it,’ she said. ‘You’re not going to have any time left over for practice. I’ll help.’
‘No, it’s OK. It shouldn’t take too long.’
Eriko looked inside the bag; it was stuffed with receipts. She pulled out the ledger and took a look, but it seemed like no one had bothered to record anything for the last two or three years.
Something fell out of the book – a plastic card.
‘Sankyo Bank. That must be the club bank account,’ Yukiho said. ‘That’s a silly place to keep the ATM card. Someone could steal it.’
‘But they couldn’t use it without the PIN number, right?’ Eriko said. Her father had recently got an ATM card, so she knew the basics.
‘I guess,’ said Yukiho, though she didn’t sound entirely convinced.
Eriko went to a corner of the practice hall and began making entries. It took much longer than she had expected. Yukiho came over and helped her midway through, but once they were done writing everything in the ledger and going through the calculations to make sure it all added up, there really was no time left over for practice. ‘I don’t see why we bothered coming at all,’ said Yukiho with a sigh.
Crestfallen, the two girls walked down the gymnasium hallway to deliver their work to Kanae, who’d said she’d be in the locker room. Almost everyone else had already left. They were a little way down the hall when they heard a voice coming from behind one of the doors.
‘Don’t treat me like I’m an idiot.’
Eriko stopped in her tracks. The voice was unmistakably Kanae’s.
‘I’m not,’ said another voice – Kazunari’s. ‘I’m being honest with you because I respect you.’
‘You call that respect? I call it making a fool of me.’
The door flew open, and Kanae stormed out, a scowl on her face. She didn’t seem to notice the two girls standing outside the door as she charged back down into the practice hall. Eriko and Yukiho exchanged glances. Neither of them wanted to call out to her.
Next Kazunari emerged. When he saw the two of them, he gave a wry smile. ‘Fancy meeting you here. I’m guessing you heard that?’
‘Shouldn’t you go after her?’ Yukiho asked.
‘No,’ he said flatly. ‘You’re on your way home too, right? Need a lift?’
‘Actually I’ve got somewhere I need to go,’ Yukiho said. ‘But I’m sure Eriko could use a ride.’
‘Yuki —’
‘I’ll make sure Kanae gets the ledger next practice,’ Yukiho interrupted her and took the bag from Eriko’s hand.
‘You sure you don’t want a ride, Yukiho?’ Kazunari asked.
‘I’m good,’ she said with a smile, walking off in the same direction Kanae had gone.
Kazunari sighed. ‘She’s going to try to smooth things over with Kanae, no doubt.’
‘Are you sure it’s OK?’ Eriko asked. ‘You don’t need to go?’
‘No, it’s fine. Everything’s fine.’ He put a hand on her arm. ‘It’s over.’
Eriko smiled, and her reflection smiled back. The black miniskirt she had on was much shorter than anything she ever would have worn before, and was showing far too much leg, she thought. She did a little twirl. He’ll like this.
‘What do you think?’ she asked the shop assistant. Ever since her date with Kazunari the other week she’d become far less bashful about talking to people in shops. The assistant took a look at Eriko and beamed.
‘It’s amazing,’ she said.
‘I’ll take it.’ It wasn’t anything too expensive, but it really fitted her. She had more confidence about picking the right clothes now, too.
Outside, it was already getting dark. She walked towards the station, quickening her pace.
The month of May was already half gone. She counted in her head. This was her fourth new outfit this month. She was going out to buy things by herself more frequently these days. She was still a little shy about taking Yukiho along on these shopping expeditions, and besides, she had fun walking until her feet hurt, trying to find clothes she thought Kazunari might like.
She walked past the display window of a department store and caught her own reflection. She wondered if the Eriko of two months earlier would even recognise her now. She was more concerned about her appearance than she had ever been before in her life. There was a constant dialogue going on in the back of her mind these days, wondering how she would look to other people, how she would look to Kazunari. She was learning how to put on make-up, and spent hours poring over fashion magazines, trying to imagine what might work for her. It was clear that the more effort she put into it, the better she looked in the mirror. That made her happy.
Yukiho even told her one day that she was blooming into something different. ‘It’s like you’re changing every day, like a butterfly coming out of its cocoon.’
‘Oh, stop, you’re embarrassing me.’
‘But it’s true,’ Yukiho said, nodding.
Eriko wanted to leave her cocoon. She was ready to emerge a real woman. She’d already gone on more than ten dates with Kazunari by that time. He’d officially asked her to go out with him the day of his fight with Kanae. He pulled over on the way to her house to ask the question.
‘Are you going out with me because you broke up with Kanae?’ Eriko had asked.
Kazunari shook his head. ‘I meant to break up with her for a while now. You were the push I needed.’
‘She’s not going to be happy when she hears.’
‘We’ll just keep it a secret for a while. As long as we don’t say anything, no problem.’
‘People will find out.’
‘Don’t worry about it. I’ll deal with it.’
‘But…’ Eriko began, but she had nothing more to say.
He’d kissed her.
Since that moment Eriko felt as though she’d been living in a dream. She worried almost daily that something so good couldn’t last this long. They had, for the time being, been able to conceal their relationship from the other people in the club. Eriko had only told Yukiho. No one else knew. As evidence, in the last two weeks, no fewer than two of the other Eimei boys had asked Eriko out on dates. Even as she turned them down, she wondered at how completely things had changed for her. Getting asked out had been almost unthinkable just a month earlier, and getting asked out twice?
She worried about Kanae – she’d only come to two practices since the breakup. Surely part of it was that she didn’t want to see Kazunari, but Eriko wondered if Kanae suspected that she was his new girlfriend. They’d passed each other once or twice in the hall at school, and each time she’d felt sharp eyes on her. Eriko would always say hello, as a matter of politeness, but Kanae would never respond. She hadn’t mentioned it to Kazunari, but it was only a matter of time before they’d have to talk about it.
Other than that, Eriko was happy. There was a spring in her step, and she often found herself smiling for no reason.
Shopping bag tucked under her arm, Eriko was almost home – an old two-storey house she’d lived in her entire life. She looked up at the sky and saw that the stars had come out. It’ll be a sunny day tomorrow, she thought. Tomorrow was Friday and she had a date with Kazunari. She wanted to wear her new miniskirt.
Then she realised she was smiling again, and blushed in spite of herself.
The phone rang three times before he heard the click of the receiver being picked up. ‘Kawashima residence.’ It was Eriko’s mother.
‘Hello, it’s Kazunari. Kazunari Shinozuka. Is Eriko home?’
There was a moment of silence. His heart sank.
‘I’m sorry, she’s out right now,’ said her mother.
Kazunari had been expecting this. ‘Do you know when she’ll be coming back?’
‘Sorry, I’m not exactly sure.’
‘She always seems to be out whenever I call. Is something the matter?’ It was his third attempt to reach her this week.
‘She’s been at a relative’s a lot lately,’ her mother said.
He heard the hesitation in her voice. It irritated him.
‘Could you have her call me when she gets back? Kazunari from Eimei. She has the number.’
‘I will, Kazunari.’
‘Thanks.’
‘Actually…’
‘Yes?’
Eriko’s mother paused for several seconds before she said, ‘I’m sorry, but to tell you the truth, I’d rather you didn’t call us any more.’
‘What?’
‘I know you two were seeing each other for a while, but… she’s still just a child. Please find somebody else. It’s what she wants.’
‘What do you mean? Did she really say that? She doesn’t want to see me any more?’
‘No…’ Another pause. ‘It’s just, she can’t see you any more. I’m sorry. It’s just not possible. Please understand, it’s not the best time for our family. Goodbye.’
‘Hold on!’ he shouted, but she’d already hung up.
Kazunari stepped out of the phone booth utterly confused.
He hadn’t heard from Eriko in more than a week. They had last spoken on the previous Wednesday. She’d told him she was going clothes shopping the next day, so she could wear something new for practice on Friday. But on Friday she didn’t show.
Yukiho had called the club to tell them that a professor had asked them to stay after class, and she and Eriko would be missing practice that day.
That night, Kazunari called Eriko at home, only to be told she was visiting relatives and wouldn’t be home that night. He called on Saturday, too. She was out than as well. Her mother’s voice on the phone seemed strained and Kazunari got the distinct impression his phone call wasn’t welcome.
Eriko had stopped coming to dance practice entirely. Yukiho wasn’t coming either, so he couldn’t even ask her what was going on. Today was Friday again and he had slipped out halfway through practice to call.
Kazunari racked his brain for a reason why Eriko should suddenly not like him – if that was even the case. What had her mother meant by it being ‘not the best time’?
Kazunari was on his way back to the practice hall when one of the girls in class ran up to tell him they’d just received a strange phone call.
‘What do you mean, strange?’
‘It was somebody asking for the head of the Seika Girls College dance club. When we said that Kanae was out, they asked for the Eimei University rep.’
‘Who was it?’
‘They wouldn’t say. They’re still on the line.’
‘Right,’ he said, heading toward the office on the first floor of the gymnasium. The phone was there, lying off the hook. He picked up the receiver.
‘Hello?’
‘Is this the head of the dance club?’ a man asked. His voice was low, but he sounded young.
‘Yes. Who is this?’
The man ignored his question. ‘There’s a girl over at Seika by the name of Kanae Kurahashi, right?’
‘What’s this about?’
‘I want you to let her know that she needs to pay up, quick.’
‘I’m sorry, is this about money?’
‘That’s right. A hundred and twenty thousand up front, and a hundred and thirty thousand when the job is done, that was the deal. Tell her to dig into that club money she’s got if she has to.’
‘I’m sorry, when what job was done?’
‘Sorry, pal, that’s none of your business.’
‘Then you’d better call her yourself.’
The man laughed. ‘Aw,’ he said, ‘but you’re the best person to give her the message.’
‘What’s that supposed to mean?’
The man hung up.
Kazunari shrugged and replaced the receiver on the hook.
Two hundred and fifty thousand yen was a lot of money. What had Kanae needed that cost that much? The man on the phone hadn’t sounded like a particularly upstanding citizen, either.
Kazunari wasn’t eager to call Kanae and ask what was up. They hadn’t spoken since they broke up. And besides, his head was too full of Eriko right now.
When practice was over, Kazunari drove home to find an envelope waiting for him in his private mailbox. It had been sent by express mail, but lacked the name of a sender. The letters of his own address looked like they’d been written by someone using a ruler, with strange, sharp-cornered characters.
He went into his room, sat down on his bed, and opened the envelope, an uneasy feeling spreading through his chest.
It contained a single photograph.
Kazunari stared at it in bewilderment.
After a few moments, the photograph slipped from his fingers to the floor.
Yukiho arrived five minutes late. Kazunari gave a little wave when he saw her. She saw him right away and walked up.
‘Sorry I’m late,’ she apologised.
‘No problem, just got here myself.’
The waitress wandered over and Yukiho ordered milk tea. It was midday on a weekday and the restaurant was nearly empty.
‘Thanks for coming out,’ said Kazunari.
‘Of course,’ she replied. ‘But, like I told you on the phone, if it’s about Eriko, I really can’t say much.’
‘You need to protect her, I understand.’
Yukiho looked down at the table. She had long eyelashes. Some of the people in the club said she looked like one of those French porcelain dolls. The comparison was admittedly apt, with the exception of her Asian eyes.
‘Of course,’ he said, ‘if I already knew what happened, there wouldn’t be much point keeping it from me.’
She looked up, startled.
‘I got a photograph in the mail. Sent anonymously.’
‘A photograph?’
Kazunari slipped his hand inside his jacket pocket. ‘I’d rather not show you if you haven’t already seen it.’
‘Wait,’ Yukiho said quickly. ‘In the back of the truck?’
‘That’s right.’
Yukiho covered her mouth with one hand. She looked as though she might burst into tears, but the waitress had just come back with her tea, so she held it in.
‘You saw it?’ he asked.
‘Yeah.’
‘Where?’
‘Eriko’s house. They sent one to her family. I couldn’t believe it.’ Yukiho’s voice was trembling.
‘What is this all about?’ Kazunari said, his hand clenching into a fist on the table.
He looked out of the window, willing himself to calm down. It was drizzling slightly. It wasn’t yet June, but the rainy season might already have started. He remembered the day that he took Eriko to the hairdresser’s. It had been raining then, too.
‘Can you tell me what happened?’
‘Isn’t it obvious? That happened.’ She pointed at his pocket.
‘That doesn’t tell me anything. Where did it happen?’
‘Near her house. On Thursday, the week before last.’
‘Thursday, you’re sure?’
‘Absolutely.’
Kazunari pulled out his calendar and looked at the date. Just as he had thought. It was the day after her last phone call – the day she said she was going to buy some clothes.
‘Has anyone called the police?’
‘No.’
‘Why not?’
‘Her parents didn’t want word getting out; they said it would be worse if everyone heard about it. And, you know, I think they’re right.’
Kazunari hit the table with his fist. He could understand how her parents felt and yet the thought that they were powerless to do anything frustrated him.
‘If they sent her a photo and they sent one to me, then this wasn’t just a random attack. Do her parents understand that?’
‘Yes,’ Yukiho said, ‘but who would do such a thing?’
‘I have an idea,’ said Kazunari softly.
‘What? Who?’
‘I think you can guess.’
They exchanged looks. It seemed Yukiho understood.
‘But, how could a woman – I mean, she couldn’t —’
‘She hired somebody who could.’
Kazunari told Yukiho about the phone call he’d received the Friday before. ‘The photo came right after the phone call, so I connected the two right away. And the man on the phone said something strange about Kanae using club money.’
He heard Yukiho catch her breath. ‘To pay the man?’
‘Yeah, I know. It’s hard to believe, so I looked into it.’
‘You asked Kanae?’
‘No, I couldn’t. But I had another way. I called the bank and asked whether anything had been withdrawn.’
‘But didn’t Kanae have the bank book?’
‘She did, but I had another way to get the information.’
A man from Sankyo Bank was a friend of the family and he had asked him for a favour.
‘So,’ Kazunari lowered his voice, ‘I found out that on Tuesday, two weeks ago, a hundred and twenty thousand was withdrawn by card. When I checked this morning, I found that another hundred and thirty thousand had been withdrawn at the beginning of the week.’
‘But there’s no way of knowing that it was Kanae who took out the money. It could have been someone else.’
‘As far as I could tell, no one except for her has had access to the card these past three weeks. And the only person who touched it before that is you,’ he said.
‘Right, when Eriko and I were doing the books for the club. But I gave the bank book and the card back to Kanae two or three days after that.’
‘And she’s had it ever since. Which makes it pretty clear that she hired somebody to attack Eriko.’
Yukiho breathed out a long sigh. ‘I just… I can’t believe it.’
‘Neither can I.’
‘But this is still just guesses, Kazunari. You don’t have proof. Someone could have just happened to take that money out of the account.’
‘Well, it’s an extremely odd coincidence if they did. I think this needs to go to the police.’
Yukiho scowled. ‘Like I said, Eriko’s family really doesn’t want this getting out. If the police get involved – even if they find out who did it – it’s not going to change what happened, and it’s not gonna make things any easier for her.’
‘That doesn’t mean we can just let this slide. I won’t let it.’
Yukiho stared at him. ‘I really don’t think it’s your decision to make.’
Kazunari blinked. He hadn’t been expecting her to say that. He caught his breath and stared at her for a moment, until she said, ‘I have a message for you from Eriko: Goodbye.’
‘Wait, that’s the message? She sent you to say goodbye.’ His hand clenched back into a fist on the table. ‘I need to see her.’
‘You can’t.’ Yukiho stood. She had hardly touched her tea. ‘I really didn’t want to have to be the messenger here.’
‘Yukiho —’
‘Goodbye,’ she said and began to walk towards the exit, but then she stopped. ‘I won’t be quitting dance club, by the way. I wouldn’t want her to think it was her fault.’
Once she was out of sight, Kazunari took a deep breath and looked out the window where the rain was still falling.
The only things on TV were boring talk shows and the news. Eriko reached for the Rubik’s Cube lying on top of the futon. Despite it having been such a big hit the year before, hardly anyone remembered the toys now. It had been fun when everyone was saying they were impossible to solve, but once the solution started making the rounds, even elementary school kids could do it in a matter of minutes. Not Eriko though, who was still struggling after four days with the infernal thing. Yukiho had brought it over for her and even taught her the basics, but she still wasn’t making any progress.
I’m no good at anything.
A knock came at the door. ‘Yukiho’s here to see you,’ said her mother.
‘OK.’
She heard footsteps approaching. The door opened slowly and Yukiho’s face peeked through. ‘Were you sleeping?’
‘Not with this to solve. Are you kidding?’ she said, holding up the Rubik’s Cube.
Yukiho smiled and came in. ‘Here,’ she said, holding up a box. It was cream puffs, Eriko’s favourite. ‘Your mom said she’d bring us tea in a bit.’
‘Great,’ Eriko said. ‘Did you see him?’
‘Yeah,’ Yukiho said. ‘I did.’
‘Did you tell him?’
‘I did. It wasn’t easy.’
‘I’m sorry I had to ask you to do that.’
‘No, it’s OK.’ Yukiho reached out and gently took Eriko’s hand in her own. ‘How do you feel? Still getting headaches?’
‘No, it’s much better today.’
Her attacker had used chloroform, which had given her headaches since the attack. Though according to the doctor, the psychological effects would be worse than anything physical.
Eriko had woken that night in the bed of a pickup truck to find her mother next to her, weeping. When Eriko hadn’t come home, her mother had left to meet her at the station, only to come across the truck, abandoned by the side of the road beneath a street light.
The photograph came several days later. There was no sender and no letter with it, yet the envelope seemed infused with a hatred that made Eriko tremble.
She understood what she had to do. She would never try to stand out from the crowd again. She would always hide behind her friends, behind Yukiho. Just as she had always done. That was really best.
There was one saving grace to the night. Strange though it was, she hadn’t been raped. Apparently, the criminal’s only objective had been to take her clothes off and take a picture. This was part of why her parents had decided not to tell the police. Once word got out, everyone would assume she had been raped. She would be marked for life.
Eriko remembered something that happened back when she was in middle school – the night she and Yukiho had found one of their classmates, abandoned, naked from the waist down.
She remembered the girl’s mother telling them that only her clothes had been removed – nothing else. Even they hadn’t believed her, but now that the same thing had happened to Eriko, she knew it was possible, just as she knew she would never be able to convince anyone else.
‘I hope you feel better soon. I’m here for you, whenever,’ said Yukiho. She held Eriko’s hand tighter.
‘Thanks, Yukiho, you’re the only friend I have.’
‘It’s OK. We’ll make it through this.’
The two girls sat quietly. The nightly news had come on TV and the newscaster’s voice echoed in the silent room.
‘… the victim – a businessman in the Tokyo area – said the money was taken out of his account without his knowledge. He only discovered the theft when he went to the bank to attempt to make a withdrawal, and discovered that instead of the two million yen he expected to find, the balance was zero. An inquiry by the bank found that the money had been withdrawn in seven separate transactions by ATM card at a branch of the Sankyo Bank in Fuchu, the last transaction taking place on April 22. Apparently, the victim had applied for a cash card from the bank, which he never used. The card was safely in his office desk. Police believe that someone forged a copy of the card and are investigating —’
Yukiho leaned over and flicked off the switch.
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